Street Action
by BearfootTruck
Summary: In one of the NYPD's toughest precincts, Officer Naruto Uzumaki is given two assignments: 1. Take down one of Chicago's most brutal gangs, and 2. Buy a gift for one of Chicago's most brutal detectives. Can he succeed? Rated T for violence, language, and implied sexual content.
1. Secret Santa

**DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fiction. Although real places are mentioned, the characters and events you are about to see are fictional, and NO identification with any persons - living or dead - is intended or should be inferred. The author has done his best to replicate the geography of New York City as best as he can, but certain locations have been changed, either to protect the innocent or to have a bit of fun. For example, don't look for Infinity disco anytime soon.**

* * *

"The wheel in the sky keeps on turning, I don't know where I'll be tomorrow."

To Officer Naruto Uzumaki, Journey had never spoken truer words, especially considering the two major objectives he'd been given today: take down a gang leader and get a Christmas present.

One of them was easy. One of them…not so much.

Naruto couldn't help but think back on how life in Bed-Stuy seemed so much simpler before he pounded the "SNOOZE" button on his radio clock in a vain attempt to get a few more minutes of sleep this morning. The only thing that gave him any consolation was rifling through the pantry to find the best part of waking up…and it wasn't Folgers.

It was Oriental-flavor instant ramen.

Though not as proficient as greats such as Emeril Lagasse or Gordon Ramsay, Naruto's cooking skills were good enough that he could boil a pot of water and not burn his ramen. While not as good as the stuff he got from local eateries, it was good enough for breakfast. Even that wasn't enough, though, and feeling like a real champ, Naruto decided to slug a carton of milk. Unfortunately for him, the milk carton had but a few drops left.

( _Ah hell, I'll just get some after today's shift…_ )

The only other beverage in Naruto's fridge was a few bottles of surplus Martinelli's cider, which he was saving for something more important. Without any other options, he boiled some more water and drank it. Though the pasteurization was a hot idea, drinking hot water…wasn't. After suppressing a neighbor-waking scream, Naruto went to the bathroom and freshened up, which meant brushing, flossing and applying deodorant. Though largely unnecessary in the cold of a New York City winter, Naruto felt that smelling good for the ladies was forever.

Only one thing remained for Naruto to do, and that was to get properly dressed. To him, this meant throwing on an orange sweater with navy blue stripes, blue jeans and blue-and-white sneakers. To protect against the bitter cold, he threw on an M51 parka.

Now ready for the day, Naruto ran outside and boogied on down to his workplace: the 79th Precinct house of the NYPD. One of the more modern houses, its brick-and-glass exterior concealed a decidedly more traditional interior with typewriters, Xerox machines and chalkboards. Inside, Naruto waved at the desk sergeant.

"Hey Bettina, how's tricks?" asked Naruto.

"Oh, same as ever!" replied Sergeant Bettina Cheng.

"That's nice!"

Eventually, Naruto made it to the locker room, where he began changing into his uniform, which included a light blue long-sleeve shirt, dark blue tie, dark blue cap, dark blue pants and black leather shoes.

"Hey Naruto, good to see you!" said Officer Sakura Haruno.

Naruto gave a thumbs up before pulling his pants on. "Good to see ya, too!"

"What's up, Naruto?" asked Detective Sasuke Uchiha, wearing a black suit and leather trench coat.

"Ah, not much! You?"

Sasuke crossed his arms. "Personally, I can't wait to prank this new hump that the white shirts dragged in."

"Huh?" Naruto blinked slowly, wondering what the supervisors had in store.

Without saying a further word, Sasuke pointed his thumb over his shoulder. What Naruto caught sight of was a pale-skinned fellow with spiky, wine-red hair. The M65 jacket, blue jeans and Corcoran tanker boots didn't arouse Naruto's interest. What did arouse his interest, however, were the new guy's black eyeliner and lack of eyebrows. Naruto shot a great big smile.

"Oh boy, a brand new fr…MMPH!"

Sasuke quickly covered Naruto's mouth. It didn't do much good, for the new guy shot a menacing glance in their direction. He didn't make eye contact with Naruto, however.

"Um…hi…N-Naruto!"

Naruto turned around to see who was talking to him. Here was Officer Hinata Hyuga, absolutely red in the face…and not from the cold, either.

"Oh hey, Hinata! Good to see ya!"

"Of c-course!"

Naruto put on his duty belt. "Come on, Hinata! Roll call's about to begin!"

* * *

After throwing on his Miklos Sas leather RMP jacket, Naruto eagerly ran to the briefing room, beating out everybody except Sergeant Kakashi Hatake. Once everybody had filed in, Kakashi took roll call and inquired about car assignments.

"Good, now here's the story:" said Kakashi. "You all know about the whole 'Secret Santa' thing we've got going on for tomorrow's Christmas Party. Don't spend more than fifteen bucks. Anybody who wants to participate should have their names in the basket by now…and this means you, Gaara. You all should have met Detective Gaara, but in case you haven't, let me explain: we've reached out to the Chicago Police for help in catching a gang leader known only as 'Tobi'. We don't know much about the perp other than the fact that he's an EDP who's left a trail of crime across the Windy City. Gaara, tell us more."

Detective Gaara – the "hump" that Sasuke had referred to – got up from his seat and picked up a manila folder from Kakashi's podium. "This file should tell you all you need to know about Tobi. It includes the only known photo of him. DO NOT ask how we got it."

Gaara handed it to the nearest officer, which happened to be Naruto. As he looked into Gaara's mint green eyes, Naruto felt a curious sense of dread, which manifested itself in the form of an involuntary gulp, hardly the mark of a true leatherman.

"Just take it." Gaara furrowed his brow.

With a jittery hand, Naruto took the folder and – managing to avoid dropping it – began perusing the contents. The photo in question was a blurry surveillance photo taken from afar. The contents included reports on the medley of crimes that Tobi and his gang – christened the New Dawn – were responsible for, including: murder, rape, and distribution of counterfeit Gummi Bears. Each report was accompanied by graphic 8x10 color glossy photos with circles and arrows and paragraphs on the back of each one explaining what each one was, to be used as evidence in putting the gang away.

"I'm showing you this for one reason:" said Gaara. "For every gang member we've killed or arrested, ten good officers have been retaliated against. Please, don't disappoint my department."

Without any further words, Gaara walked back to his seat. In spite of the general sense of fear that pervaded the hearts of each and every MOS, there was also a drive to succeed, to prove to the Second City that the Big Apple could take down even the slimiest of worms.

"Any questions?" asked Kakashi.

None whatsoever.

"OK, I'm going to pass around the basket of names now."

With that, Kakashi passed around a red wicker basket with strips of paper. Each strip of paper had a name on it. Naruto was giddy with excitement, mainly because he relished the thought of making Hinata so happy for the rest of her life with a small bar of Icelandic chocolate. It didn't matter to him that she loved those weird foreign chocolates to the point of obsession. As long as she was happy, then he would be, too. When the basket came to Naruto, he didn't even bother fiddling around; he impulsively snatched a name out of the basket. It was…

Gaara.

Naruto suppressed a loud gasp as he looked at the name. It was bad enough that he didn't get the name he was hoping for, but to get the name of a cold, calculating detective who appeared to harbor a psychotic streak? He just couldn't take it.

"Everybody got a name?" asked Kakashi.

An affirmative chorus came from all the officers.

"Good. Let's be careful on the streets."

* * *

 **Criticism is gold. Negativity and nitpicking are pyrite.**


	2. How MOS Operate

Back in the present, Naruto drove his RMP – a 1977 Plymouth Fury – with listless energy and joyless precision.

"Naruto…are you all right?" asked Hinata, wearing a Smith-Gray wool reefer coat.

Naruto didn't respond.

"Naruto, please answer me!"

Naruto cracked a slight smirk. "Oh, don't worry about me! I'm absolutely THRILLED to have picked a random EDP who I know NOTHING about to play 'Secret Santa' to! Nothing else could make my day better! Believe it!"

"Is that what's bothering you?"

"NO! I'm FINE!"

"If you don't know what to get, I can help you. It's OK to tell me who you picked."

Naruto dropped his phony smirk. "Thanks, but I'm gonna pass."

"Central to 79-Adam," said the dispatcher.

Hinata picked up the radio mic. "79-Adam K."

"79-Adam, we have a report of a 10-24 man with knives, at 753 Myrtle Ave. Gonna be at Marcy Playground. Suspect is described as a male Caucasian, blue jacket, black pants."

"10-4, Central."

Naruto and Hinata headed down to Marcy Playground, which had nothing to do with either sex or candy. In order to help their arrival, Naruto turned on the car's lights and gave a few "whoop whoops" from the siren when needed. At the playground, they pulled up and got out of the car with their revolvers drawn.

"Hey, drop the knives!" said Naruto.

The knife thrower froze.

"All right, what's this about?" demanded the knife thrower.

"I said drop the knives!" said Naruto.

"But how else am I gonna practice?"

"Drop the knives!"

"Look, I'm tryin' to practice for next year's circus! I had nowhere else to do this!"

"Sure ya didn't! Now drop the knives, put your hands behind your head and interlock your fingers!"

The knife thrower groaned. "Fine…"

As the knife thrower did so, Naruto and Hinata moved in quickly yet gingerly. When they got closer, they got a rather shocking sight: a little girl on the ground, groaning and bleeding after being struck by one of the knives.

"I'll help her out!"

Hinata rushed back to the RMP when she noticed this. In the girl's favor, the knife hadn't managed to embed itself deep into her flesh. Meanwhile, Naruto kept his Smith & Wesson Model 10 trained on the knife thrower. Hinata made it back with a medical kit.

"I called for a bus," said Hinata.

"Good." Naruto moved in on the knife thrower and cuffed him while waiting for the ambulance to arrive.

* * *

After bringing the knife thrower in for booking, Naruto and Hinata continued their patrol. A few flakes of snow were coming down by now, and Naruto's mood had yet to improve.

"Hmph…" Naruto gripped the steering wheel tightly.

"Naruto, are you still worried?" asked Hinata.

"What, me worry? Hardly! I mean, have I ever worried before?"

Hinata averted her gaze and tapped her index fingers together. "Well…"

"Know what? Don't answer that one! I…"

Naruto was cut off when he saw a couple arguing. Knowing that nothing good could come of this, Naruto slowed the RMP down, and as he was doing so, the man snatched the woman's purse and dumped the contents onto the sidewalk.

"You pick that up right now or I bust your face in!" said the man.

"I told ya, my momma needed that money for groceries!" The woman appeared to be tearing up.

"Well, she gonna need it to…"

"FREEZE, BUSTER!" shouted Naruto.

The man turned around when he heard Naruto shout. In spite of this, he held his ground.

"Yo, what's your problem, fuzz!?" said the man.

"Don't ya know it's illegal to force a woman to pick up the contents of her purse?" said Naruto.

The man crossed his arms. "Big deal! Bitch owes me a lotta money!"

"Don't listen to him, officers!" said the woman. "I already…"

The man smacked the woman. "Shut your mouth, bitch!"

Naruto quickened his pace. "Oh, you just dug yourself in deeper, pal!"

The man put up his fists. "Wanna scrap!? Come on! I got a black belt in kung fu!"

Naruto let out a devious smirk. "I'll bet you do!"

Naruto approached the man. When he got close enough, the man sent a powerful right hook Naruto's way, but Naruto sidestepped the blow, grabbed the man's arm and threw his weight at him. Though half a head shorter, Naruto managed to throw the perp on the ground and subdue him. While the perp was disoriented, Naruto gripped the guy's right hand behind his head and did a quick pat down for weapons, which yielded nothing.

"Not so tough now, huh?" said Naruto. "Looks like you'll be gone for a while!"

"Suck it, pig!"

While Naruto was dealing with the perp, Hinata was helping the woman gather her belongings, keeping in mind the slight yet real possibility that the victim could be setting her up.

"Thank you so much, officer!" The woman did her best to suppress tears. "I don't know how I can repay you!"

"Oh, that's really not necessary," said Hinata, "but I can put in a good word to our supervisor if you want."

The woman took her purse. "What's your name, hon?"

"I'm Officer Hinata Hyuga."

The woman cracked a weak smile. "My name is Patricia Newbury, but you can call me Pat."

Hinata did a slight bow. "Nice to meet you, Pat!"

* * *

With the man locked up, patrol continued, and Naruto's mood had not improved. Hinata put her hand on Naruto's shoulder.

"Naruto, you can't keep worrying like this! It's not good for your health!"

"Yeah, well neither is having to get a gift for somebody you don't even know!" said Naruto.

Hinata smiled. "You could get an Amazon gift card. Everybody loves those!"

"Nah, this guy doesn't seem like the kind who would appreciate it."

"Who did you get, anyways?"

"Well, since we might die, I'm gonna tell you. It's…"

"All units in the vicinity, we have a 10-11 silent at Eli's Deli & Grocery on 282 Nostrand Ave," said the dispatcher. "Handle Code 3."

Naruto avoided using the siren when he could, but did flip on the lights as he barrelled on to the bodega where the incident was taking place.

Meanwhile, Hinata picked up the radio mic. "79-Adam to Central, will handle the alarm at 282 Nostrand Ave. Can you give us a description of the suspect?"

"79-Adam, we have no description of the suspect at this time."

"10-4, Central."

He screeched to a halt outside the store and drew his service revolver as he stepped out of the car. Both officers ducked behind the car doors as cover. Meanwhile, Hinata grabbed the radio mic and switched the siren to PA mode.

"Attention, this is the NYPD," said Hinata. "You are under arrest and there is no way out. Please exit through the front door with your hands in the air. We will give you fair treatment if you do."

By this time, 79-David – a 1976 Plymouth Fury driven by Officers Rock Lee and Tenten – showed up. Both officers took a similar approach as Naruto and Hinata. Keeping his revolver pointed at the store, Naruto drew his handie-talkie.

"79-Adam to 79-David, see if there's a back alley you two can go through," said Naruto.

"10-4," said Tenten.

Lee and Tenten got back in their RMP and drove around the block. Not long after, two Hispanic males emerged from the bodega: a scruffy looking one in a black hoodie who was holding the other – an older guy – at gunpoint.

"If you two _cobanis_ don't back away, grandpa here's gonna get it!" said the robber.

"Please, do what he says!" cried the shopkeeper. "I don't want to die!"

The robber jabbed his Detonics 1911 at the shopkeeper. "Shut up, _pendejo_!"

"Listen, man, you don't wanna do this!" said Naruto.

"You think I don't wanna do this!?" said the robber. "I will splatter this guy's brains all over the ground! Go on, keep messin' with me and find out!"

"Please, talk to us!" said Hinata. "Let us know what you need!"

"You know what I need!?" said the robber. "Money! My father's dying in one of your hospitals and he needs a new heart!"

"We're sorry to hear that! What's his name?"

"Why should I tell you his name!? He's probably gonna get shot again by you trigger-happy pigs anyways!"

"Why would you think that?"

"Don't play dumb! This is America! You people and your stupid guns killed my mother, and now one of your bullets grazed my father's heart!"

Hinata did her best to keep her emotions from welling up as she remembered how her cousin Neji was killed on The Job not too long ago. She kept a firm grip on her gun as she tried to avoid getting absorbed in the situation.

"We'll do what we can for your father!" said Hinata. "I promise!"

"Promise all you want, but…"

Suddenly, Tenten snuck up and grabbed the robber's arm and attempted to snatch the gun from him. The robber managed to discharge the weapon once before losing his grip on it, but nobody was struck. He spat all manner of curses and insults in Spanish at Tenten and Lee as they wrestled him to the ground and cuffed him.

"79-Adam to Central," said Hinata.

"Central, go ahead."

"79-David has apprehended the suspects."

"10-4."

* * *

 **Criticism is gold. Negativity and nitpicking are pyrite.**


	3. Prelude, Raid and Aftermath

**A/N: Due to some error or other, it appears that the last update didn't bump this fic up to the top like it should have, so if you missed any previous chapters, check 'em out before you read this one! Also, I hope you're having a Merry Christmas or whatever it is you celebrate!  
**

* * *

Another case down, and patrol resumed. Hinata wiped her brow.

"Boy, that was a tense standoff!" she said. "I don't know how people can get used to that!"

"I don't think we're supposed to get used to…" Naruto was interrupted when he felt his stomach growling.

"What's wrong?"

Naruto smiled. "Ah, I guess being near a bodega made me hungry!"

"Do you wanna take lunch now?"

Naruto gave a thumbs up. "Believe it!"

"Where to?"

"Ever heard of Samurai Papa on 594 Lafayette Ave?"

"No."

"They have some really good ramen! Believe it!"

"OK…" Hinata picked up the radio mic. "79-Adam to Central."

"Central, go ahead."

"Central, we request 10-63 at Samurai Papa on 594 Lafayette Ave."

"79-Adam, 10-4 on the 10-63."

"10-4."

* * *

An offshoot of Williamsburg's Samurai Mama, Samurai Papa had two locations in operation. The one on Lafayette Ave was a rather cramped place with no sitting room, but that made no difference to Naruto or Hinata. They strode on in, picked free spots at the counter and waited for somebody to take their order.

"Hey, officers!" said their waitress, a blonde with her hair in a bun. "Can I start you two off with drinks?"

Hinata raised her hand. "Just water, thank you."

"Yeah, let me get a Coke, please," said Naruto.

The waitress left to get their drinks. Shortly thereafter, Naruto felt a cold, menacing presence sit down on the empty stool next to him.

"Hello…Officer Uzumaki."

Naruto turned to see who was greeting him. Much to his misfortune, it was Gaara.

"Hey there, Gaara!" Naruto faked a smile. "Please…call me Naruto!" He couldn't help but notice another familiar face with Gaara. "Hey Sasuke, how's this hump been treatin' you?"

"He's actually not that bad," said Sasuke.

"You know, you really should watch your mouth before making assumptions about people," said Gaara. "One day, you might get killed because of it…or didn't they teach you that at the academy?"

"Hey, you'd be surprised what they taught us there!" said Naruto. "Believe it!"

"Quite frankly, I don't believe it."

"He seems like a loser, but he's actually a very kind person," said Sasuke. "Just ignore him if he's bothering you."

"I for one would rather waste him," said Gaara, "but since we're on the same side, I'm staying my trigger finger."

"Guys, can we please get a grip on ourselves?" said Hinata. "We're making ourselves look bad in front of the general public!"

The three male officers simply stared at Hinata as if she had three arms, causing her to blush.

"So Gaara…h-how's the Tobi case coming along?" asked Hinata.

"We've found no solid leads on his location," said Gaara, "but the boss will inform you when we do."

Hinata nodded. "Understood."

* * *

Once their meal had ended, Naruto, Hinata, Gaara and Sasuke went off on patrol again.

"So, as I was gonna say earlier, I'm gonna tell you who I picked," said Naruto.

"Who?"

"It's Gaara."

"Why didn't you say so before?"

"Well, I got interrupted by the last call, plus with him being at the restaurant, I couldn't say it out loud."

"I…guess I understand." Hinata put her hand on Naruto's shoulder. "If it makes you feel any better, I'll try to feel him out."

"You'd really do that for me?"

Hinata smiled. "Of course!"

"Any units in the vicinity, we have multiple reports of 10-10 shots fired, near 95 Sandford Street. Handle Code 3."

Hinata picked up the radio mic. "79-Adam to Central, will handle the call near 95 Sandford Street."

"79-Adam, 10-4."

With lights and siren going, Naruto and Hinata headed to the location of the shots fired. It wasn't too hard for them to find, for there was a group of people massing around what appeared to be a short alleyway. Once they came to a stop, the two officers began crowd control.

"Step aside, we're police officers!" said Naruto.

As the two cops came through the crowd, they found the source of the shots fired, and it was anything but a pretty sight: a fat black man was lying on his back with a bullet through his head and a Smith & Wesson Model 686 in his hand. Despite the damage, Naruto recognized the man as Sean Douglas, leader of the Gates Ave Mafia. He had no time to dwell upon what Douglas was doing there, however, and instead took his handie-talkie out.

"79-Adam to Central."

"Central, go ahead."

"We got one DOA at 95 Sandford Street. Get a squad down here ASAP."

"10-4."

While waiting for a detective unit to arrive, Naruto and Hinata tried to sort out the actual witnesses from the random onlookers and keep the scene secure. Soon enough, Sasuke and Gaara were on scene. Within minutes, Sasuke found an expended shell casing.

"Take a look at this," said Sasuke.

"I recognize the casing," said Gaara. "That's a 7.62 Tokarev."

"I've never heard of it before."

"It's a Russian design."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. "Are you telling me that the Russian Mob is involved?"

"Not necessarily. The New Dawn could be responsible. They tend to favor exotic weaponry."

"If that's the case, then this could be the big break we've been looking for."

Sasuke slid the shell off of the pencil he was using to hold it and into a small plastic bag. Little did he know that the denouement to this case was going to have a significant impact on one of his fellow officers…

* * *

The next hour proved to be an oddly snoozy one for Naruto and Hinata. Then, they got orders to report to Greene Ave.

"10-4." Hinata put down the radio mic. "What do you suppose this is about?"

Naruto shrugged. "Who knows?"

"You don't think this could have anything to do with the New Dawn, could it?"

"Hinata, I don't care what it has to do with! It could be that somebody's planted a nuclear bomb in the city! As long as I get that gift for Gaara, that's what matters!"

"Do you think we could…Naruto, we're here."

Naruto pulled the RMP up to Greene Ave. A bunch of NYPD vehicles were here, including Kakashi's 1974 Chevy Blazer and a 1977 Boyertown van, which meant that members of the famed Emergency Service Unit were on the scene. Upon exiting, Naruto and Hinata exchanged their normal hats for black-over-white riot helmets. As for weaponry, Naruto grabbed an Uzi from the Fury's trunk, while Hinata popped open the shotgun lock and grabbed the Ithaca 37 from inside the car.

"So, what are we lookin' at, Kakashi?" asked Naruto.

"Tobi and his gang are believed to be holed up in a townhouse on Clifton Place," said Kakashi. "We're not sure how many are inside, but we're considering all of them armed and extremely dangerous, which is why ESU is taking care of the situation."

"So what do you want us to do, sir?" asked Hinata.

"Hold tight and establish a perimeter," said Kakashi. "Don't move in unless anything goes especially wrong."

Both officers nodded and headed back to their RMP. For Naruto, waiting for the ESU to come out with Tobi was one of the more boring parts of the day, although considering that the gang were willing to murder a notorious gang leader, he was sure that there would be at least some shooting involved. He kept a firm grip on his Uzi. Under ordinary circumstances, Naruto was like most cops in that shooting a suspect was generally the last thing he wanted to do. However, the New Dawn were no ordinary suspects, and he would waste them without hesitation given the chance. For now, though, he figured it would be best to let ESU do their job. Judging by the radio transmissions, things seemed to be going well for the team. To alleviate his boredom, Naruto hummed some Bachman-Turner Overdrive tunes that he'd heard on whatever classic rock stations tickled his fancy over the years. He was in the middle of "Roll on Down the Highway" when he heard a sinister series of transmissions…

"Hey, is that door wired?" said one voice.

Naruto cringed when he recognized it as Sakura's

"GET BACK! GET BACK!" shouted another.

Though a bit muffled, Naruto could still hear the explosion that came from within the town house. That, and the subsequent barrage of gunfire told him everything he needed to know.

"Screw this scene, man!" Naruto hopped in the driver's seat of his Fury, dumped the transmission into Reverse and pulled a J-turn.

"NARUTO!" Hinata attempted to run after him.

"Naruto, where do ya think you're going!?" Kakashi tried to stop him as well, but human feet were no match for the power of a V8 engine.

After pulling onto Clifton Place, Naruto stopped, exited the car and rushed into the townhouse like a bat out of hell. By this time, the shooting was still ongoing. A few ESU members had been injured by the explosion, but no officers were dead. Yet. Ignoring the barrage of bullets and letting out a mighty scream, Naruto opened fire on any gangbangers he saw and didn't hesitate for even a microsecond. Within the proverbial New York Minute, he had managed to waste numerous gang members – including one with an M240B machine gun – chew up some serious flooring and destroy some priceless artifacts. Only Tobi – a taller man wearing an orange mask – remained in any condition to fight, and it was only after Naruto shot him in the hand and caused him to drop his Heckler & Koch G36C did he stop.

"All right, let's see if you're the guy Alice Cooper was singin' about…"

Keeping one hand on his Uzi and a devious smirk on his face, Naruto removed Tobi's mask and got a rude shock: the man behind the mask was none other than…

"Obito Uchiha?"

"Yes, I remember you well…son of Minato Namikaze."

Naruto went pale and lost his smirk. "That's _Officer_ Naruto Uzumaki to you, you putrid mope!"

Obito picked up where Naruto's smirk had left off. "And you've still got the same fire as your father did. Too bad it won't bring him back."

"Drop the act and put your hands behind your head, bub!"

"You're telling _me_ to drop the act? Tell me, Uzumaki, do you remember the day your parents died?"

"SHUT UP, MORON!"

"Oh, how I still relish that day. You should have seen your father begging me to stop as I cut poor Kushina's throat open from ear to ear."

Obito started cackling. This was the straw that broke the back of Naruto's camel.

"DIE!"

Naruto gave Obito a seismic shove and prepared to fire…

"NARUTO…NO!"

Hinata had arrived at the last second, which prompted Naruto to back off on the trigger.

"Naruto, don't shoot!" said Kakashi.

"This mutt ruined my entire life, and I'm not about to forgive him, so give me a good reason why I shouldn't!" said Naruto.

"Because you're a good cop, and that's the last thing you should even think about!" said Kakashi.

"I know I'm a good cop, but sometimes, we have to break the law like Judas Priest!"

"Naruto, if you kill this man, we might lose out on valuable information that could topple other gang members."

"Yeah, see if I give a rat's ass!" Naruto turned around and prepared to fire.

Hinata put a fist on her hip. "Naruto, I'm warning you, if you even think about pulling that trigger, then we're through!"

"Let me ask you," said Kakashi, "is jeopardizing relations with your friends worth getting revenge on those whom you deem responsible for ruining your life?"

Naruto gave a death stare to Kakashi.

"If you don't care about losing your job and going to prison…" said Hinata, "…what about us?"

Having discovered a slight hint of vulnerability in Kakashi's uncovered eye, Naruto found the effect even more pronounced in Hinata, who reminded him of the day they met back in grade school, only this time, it was even sadder. How could he disappoint her like this? After receiving such looks, Naruto tossed his Uzi aside.

"All right, guys…you win." Naruto pointed a thumb at a confused Obito. "Now get that mope outta my sight!"

Hinata, Kakashi and a couple of ESU members moved in to secure Obito and any other gang members who might have survived. Objective one accomplished.

* * *

 **Criticism is gold. Negativity and nitpicking are pyrite.**


	4. Suicide

In the end, some members of the New Dawn were DOA or otherwise succumbed to their injuries en route to the hospital, but all NYPD officers involved in the raid survived. Even so, Naruto was brought to the office of Deputy Inspector Iruka Umino for a lecture.

"Naruto, I love you, and you're one of my best officers, but I'm afraid I can't let your unbridled rage go. This is the…well, I've lost count of how many times you've acted up on The Job like this."

"So what, Deputy Inspector Iruka?" Naruto crossed his arms. "It's every New Yorker's God-given right to be pissed off at people who ruin their lives!"

"You're a police officer, and part of being a police officer means you have to make certain sacrifices, like getting mad at every single suspect who hurts a woman, for example."

"And what if that was YOUR mother he was talking about, huh!?"

"Believe me, I wanted to kill the man who killed my parents, too. However, Deputy Inspector Sarutobi would never have promoted me if I did. Doesn't the prospect of becoming Police Commissioner still appeal to you?"

"What's the point? I'm probably gonna die before then anyways!"

Iruka pounded on his desk. "Damn it, Naruto, what's with the sudden cynicism!? You never used to be so open about it!"

"Well maybe if I'd picked a name that was familiar to me, then I wouldn't have to be open about it!"

"Naruto, is that why your attitude's changed? The Secret Santa event?"

Naruto sighed and loosened his arms. "Forget what I just said, sir. Can I do my paperwork? I kinda got a lot of it…"

Iruka gave a curt nod. "I'll allow it, but you'd better think about what we've said here, understand?"

"Believe it."

"And for God's sake, bring that smile of yours back." Iruka smiled. "You look prettier with a smile."

In spite of his morbid mood, Naruto couldn't help but crack a smile as he exited Iruka's office.

* * *

Later that night, Naruto's friends crossed the Brooklyn Bridge for a night out on Manhattan. The crux of said night took place at Infinity, a discotheque on Broadway. Its plain black entry door gave way to a block-long dancefloor, dotted above by four disco balls. Each disco ball was surrounded by three neon rings. Complementing the disco balls were four columns near the bar, each surrounded by progressively larger neon rings of their own. If looked at, some mirrors would make the disco balls appear to go on forever, hence the name "Infinity". Currently, the DJ was spinning the 1983 remix of "SOS (Love to the Rescue)" by Dee D. Jackson. Naruto's friends were having a good time…that is, except for two people…

"W…what are you doing here, Gaara?" Hinata nervously played around with her Virgin Colada as she sat at the bar.

"You're Hinata, right?"

"Y…yes…"

"If you must know, I'm only here because the pink girl dragged me here. And where's Naruto?"

"Gee…I wish I knew. He always loved disco dancing…"

Gaara took a swig of his Bacardi and Coke. "Well, it's no matter to me. I hate disco music."

"What do you like?"

"Since you asked, I'll tell you. I'm more of a heavy metal guy."

Hinata raised an eyebrow. "Oh?"

" _Why_ are you looking at me like that?"

"N-no reason…"

It was at this moment that Hinata knew that her attitude betrayed everything. Ergo, she got up from her seat and boogied on out the front door. A moment later, Sasuke showed up.

"Gaara, have you seen Hinata?" asked Sasuke.

"She left."

"Why?"

"Hell if I know. Hell if I care."

* * *

Hinata Ubered her way back to Brooklyn. Having visited Naruto before, it was no hassle for her to find his apartment. Her heart sank, not only because she felt as though she'd ditched her friends, but also because he hadn't returned her latest text like he usually did. Nevertheless, she pressed on up to Naruto's apartment. When she knocked, she got no response.

"Naruto, open up! It's me, Hinata!"

No response. Still fearing that it might have happened, Hinata delivered a swift kick to the door and rushed for the bedroom. Much to her misfortune, her fear was about to come true: Naruto was sitting on his bed, in his underwear, tearing up, with a Colt Detective Special pointed at his head. Hinata gasped.

"NARUTO!"

"Hinata, don't come any closer!"

"What do you think you're doing!?"

"I know exactly what I'm doing, and if you know what's good for you, you'll leave me alone!"

"But I can't do that! The people at the academy told us not…"

"I don't care what those half-wits at the academy told us! This is the streets; things don't always go the way they're supposed to!"

"Then at least tell me what's upsetting you!"

"Oh, you mean aside from the fact that I met the man who killed my parents and I still don't have any idea what to get that psycho detective for tomorrow's Christmas party!? NOTHING! That's what's wrong!"

"Can we talk about the Christmas party, though?"

Naruto's gun hand became shakier. "W-why?"

"If you put down the gun, I promise I'll help you out with Gaara's gift!"

"You first!"

"No, you go first."

"I SAID 'YOU FIRST' FIRST!"

Hinata recoiled at the sudden outburst of anger. Nevertheless, she maintained her composure as best as she could.

"Well…all right. Gaara told me that he's into heavy metal."

"R-really?" Naruto relaxed his stance a bit.

Hinata mustered up a smile. "Really. Oh…and Naruto…"

"W-what?"

"I love you."

That did it. Having been hit by three of the most powerful words in the English language, Naruto realized what a fool he'd been and slowly lowered his Detective Special. With the danger passing, Hinata got up onto the bed and hugged him. After giving a loud yet brief gasp, Naruto started crying and hugged her back. All these years, having mistaken Hinata's affections as no more than friendly gestures, it brought on a tremendous sense of satisfaction knowing that she truly loved him. He didn't even pay much attention to the fact that her ample chest was pressing against his head. To him, she was like the mother he never had. Even after he stopped crying, Naruto didn't want to let go. Hinata was just too soft and huggly for that. She respected his wishes, but when her face got too red, she just had to let go, and he let go not too long after.

"Thanks, Hinata. You're good people, ya know that?"

"Awww…you're welcome!"

Hinata produced a small packet of tissues from her cleavage, which Naruto quickly swiped and blew his nose with.

"By the way, Hinata…"

"Yes?"

"I love you, too!"

With that, Naruto began kissing Hinata and lowered the straps on her lavender Halston dress. She undid the clasp on her bra, and things only got filthier from there…

* * *

When the sparks stopped flying, Naruto and Hinata cleaned up and huggled with each other.

"Naruto, I know it's not Christmas, but that's the best gift I've ever gotten from you!"

"Speak for yourself! I didn't know how else I was gonna repay you for saving my life tonight! Now I know exactly what I'm gonna get for Gaara!"

"Really?"

"Of course!"

"What are you going to get him?"

"You'll see!"

Hinata smiled. Knowing that things had turned out for the better was a gift in and of itself.

* * *

The next morning, Naruto awoke to the smell of ramen. As it turned out, Hinata had heated up his leftovers from when he left work yesterday.

"Gee, thanks, Hinata!" Naruto hear the sound of a bottle popping open. "HEY! I was saving that!"

Hinata poured a couple glasses of Martinelli's. "I know you like to save those for special occasions, so I decided to open one for us."

"OK, I'll let ya slide, babe!"

Hinata smiled. "Thanks again, Naruto!"

Once breakfast was done, both parties freshened up and got dressed together.

"Hey, since we're scheduled to do the 4 to 12 today, I was wondering what you wanted to do before work," said Hinata.

"Know what I wanna do? I wanna TICKLE TICKLE TICKLE!"

"NARUTO, STAHP! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Hinata doubled over on the floor, but Naruto kept tickling her until he felt like stopping.

* * *

Before their scheduled shift, Naruto sidled on over to the nearest record store, and after a little game of "ink-a-bink-a-bottle-of-ink", he decided to peruse the heavy metal cassettes. Not being an extreme metalhead, he chose one at random. It was a cassette from a band called Lady, titled "MOUNTAIN OF MADNESS".

( _Hey, only five bucks!_ ) thought Naruto. ( _I'm sure Gaara will like it!_ )

Once he'd paid for his cassette, Naruto got the nearest copy of _The New York Times_ and used it as wrapping paper. Fortunately, he made it to the 79th Precinct house with time to spare. Then, the big moment came…

"Ladies and gentlemen," said Kakashi, "you may now exchange your gifts."

With only a slight bit of trepidation in his step, Naruto approached Gaara.

"Merry Christmas, Gaara!"

"Hm."

Regarding the crude wrapping paper with suspicion, Gaara opened his present. When he viewed the cover, he let out a loud gasp as his eyes widened.

"Naruto, do you have any idea what you have here!?" Gaara blushed.

Naruto gulped. "A heavy metal tape?"

"This is an extremely rare tape that my sister once gave me! Mine got stolen in college!" Gaara began tearing up, and then smiled. "Thank you so much!"

As if the whirlwind of emotions put on by a man that Naruto once deemed a "psycho" wasn't enough, Gaara gave Naruto a big hug, which Naruto gladly returned with a smile. This elicited a collective "awww" from their fellow MOS.

"You're welcome, Gaara! Sorry I ever thought you were a psycho!"

"You're forgiven!"

And with that, peace on Earth had yet to be completely attained, but good will towards all seemed like a very real possibility.

* * *

 **Criticism is gold. Negativity and nitpicking are pyrite.**


End file.
